Tuesday, July 05, 2011
July 5th
After a wonderful Sunday like atmosphere, all the kids here for dinner and then off they went to the fireworks, Fred and I snuggled up in our room under the air conditioning and I lamented, "oh how I love Fireworks" and Fred said, "yes I know" and if it wasnt for this dumb back and the fact that I wanted to spend the day with the kids and make my blueberry cake I would have been there on the esplanade... it is a wonderful place to spend the 4th of July, it is the patriotic best. So someday I know I will do it again, maybe I will be able to convince the entire family that they need to come spend the day...but crowds are not everyone forte...it isn't that crowded... but the fireworks along the Charles now they are crowded but beautiful and Ive seen them so many times fresh to my eyes... and yes like being at Disney, I wish I could see them everynight. Maybe that is Why I like Disney so much!
Monday, July 04, 2011
Four of July
Amazing. Life
But the there is Death. My cousin barely a year older then me passed.
Rip Marianne. 2-56---6-11.
Then life sucks. Arghh
But the there is Death. My cousin barely a year older then me passed.
Rip Marianne. 2-56---6-11.
Then life sucks. Arghh
Sunday, July 03, 2011
July 3rd, how is it possible
All through life people say... it is static, life goes by too quickly and how I agree, one moment leads to the next and suddenly everything that was has changed and grown, been redeveloped, or developed, much like hair, cutting, changing, colored, braided, ponied, but still the same head, only aging...
Yesterday, It killed me to work, so many people around me, and my family texting me pictures, pictures of the kids in the pool, pics of the new baby, who wants to work with all that happiness taking place at home.... drudgery... but alas work can be an escape to from the madness, but all went well last night, the youngins are growing up and the older ones are getting used to the fact that they aren't the youngins any more.
F and I hide in our roon... It is too funny
Yesterday, It killed me to work, so many people around me, and my family texting me pictures, pictures of the kids in the pool, pics of the new baby, who wants to work with all that happiness taking place at home.... drudgery... but alas work can be an escape to from the madness, but all went well last night, the youngins are growing up and the older ones are getting used to the fact that they aren't the youngins any more.
F and I hide in our roon... It is too funny
Saturday, July 02, 2011
the weekend
the weekend is here--- for some I should say, but not for me, work today and I would much prefer to stay home, two babies are here, my little Ricky who really isn't a baby anymore but I love him so, he has the most vibrant personality, he makes me smile when I see him.
He lost his first tooth, July 1st, 2011. Does anyone every remember when they lost his first tooth. I don't think they do unless there is an extremely zealous Mom or Dad who keeps a journal forever...and it is so easy to do write about the children every waking moment.
Like Johnny, Ricky, and Alastair they are just the best, and I am laughing to myself thinking they are almost exactly 6 years apart from the three of them... how amazing is life. I wish I had more strength and more energy in my days. I get soooo tired. sigh.. I am off to work boo hoo
He lost his first tooth, July 1st, 2011. Does anyone every remember when they lost his first tooth. I don't think they do unless there is an extremely zealous Mom or Dad who keeps a journal forever...and it is so easy to do write about the children every waking moment.
Like Johnny, Ricky, and Alastair they are just the best, and I am laughing to myself thinking they are almost exactly 6 years apart from the three of them... how amazing is life. I wish I had more strength and more energy in my days. I get soooo tired. sigh.. I am off to work boo hoo
Friday, July 01, 2011
new motherhood --- a glance as i am watching
in the middle of the night past midnight ...there is a faint knock on my door...momma...i dont think he is breathing right...i jump out of bed and put my robe on... he is fine..he is tiny...he is breathing nicely...not a quiver, just peaceful in his momms's arm..he is just that tiny...i want to snuggle him up every waking minute...
i worry about her not sleeping because she can't take her eyes off of him...
and i rest uneasy with worry...
she loves him so much...
it makes me cry
i worry about her not sleeping because she can't take her eyes off of him...
and i rest uneasy with worry...
she loves him so much...
it makes me cry
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Note
At approx. 5 pm this evening my long time ... I'm not going to NYC with you husband said. We will go in the fall. I don't f'n believe it. So I am writing this here to prove it. Ya! Now he says. Talk. I said he is reneging. He says he us not. Ok. Here we go!
June29th..
Wow another day gone by and nearly a month. Craziness still happening...lots of noise and the ins and outs of children and grandchildren...life is not an idle... it is a fast paced run... B and I need a vacation...i just might plan one for September again... I don't know have to wait and see... Funds low.... should I play the lottery..haha I make myself laugh because I am not usually lucky at anything...
oh well back to the grind..again
Dianna says she was up and couldnt sleep worried about the baby. she cannot see him through the bassinet... relax i say but that is easy for me being a new mom is scary but she is doing well considering that i think she is on her own is many ways. this of course if annoying me...anyone have a brick...
oh well back to the grind..again
Dianna says she was up and couldnt sleep worried about the baby. she cannot see him through the bassinet... relax i say but that is easy for me being a new mom is scary but she is doing well considering that i think she is on her own is many ways. this of course if annoying me...anyone have a brick...
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Note
If you build s support system make sure it is strong and will be there no
Matter what. If you build one falsely it will fall apart and when you really need it you will be have so many things falling apart at once you just might collapse
How people thought perceptions are all parts of being human. Without them you might as well not bother to be Those without thought and perception. What are they really. Not human at all. Monsters in our dreams Beasts to our hearts and tickets to the tear joint
Matter what. If you build one falsely it will fall apart and when you really need it you will be have so many things falling apart at once you just might collapse
How people thought perceptions are all parts of being human. Without them you might as well not bother to be Those without thought and perception. What are they really. Not human at all. Monsters in our dreams Beasts to our hearts and tickets to the tear joint
Monday, June 27, 2011
Passion
I am filled with Passion. If someone says I'm
High strung. I have to say. No I'm passionate about everything. I have energy that others would like to bottle am I bragging. No. It is fact. But I love to read and relax and write and love passionately too.
So if you know me. Be prepared for my zealousness because it is here even when I'm sleeping
High strung. I have to say. No I'm passionate about everything. I have energy that others would like to bottle am I bragging. No. It is fact. But I love to read and relax and write and love passionately too.
So if you know me. Be prepared for my zealousness because it is here even when I'm sleeping
back to the grind
don't want to do it, but have to ...i only have to work a month and then ill have two weeks off... well here i go...
very meloncholy... so much to do and not enough energy can someone give me some. off i go
very meloncholy... so much to do and not enough energy can someone give me some. off i go
Sunday, June 26, 2011
finally figured how to post pics
After trial and error...I figured out how to post pics via my iphone... I phones are not compatible with things not Apple...and though i love my iphone all can be a learning curve on how to do things, or how to do the things that you like to do. This has been such a wonderful last past week, how can another week top it....that i do not know.
So here I go ....
So here I go ....
finally figured how to post pics
After trial and error...I figured out how to post pics via my iphone... I phones are not compatible with things not Apple...and though i love my iphone all can be a learning curve on how to do things, or how to do the things that you like to do. This has been such a wonderful last past week, how can another week top it....that i do not know.
So here I go ....
So here I go ....
test link
http://i258.photobucket.com/albums/hh280/reddragonarts/Dianna%20and%20Alastair%2006252011/20110625mfachihulydiannaalastairpam179.jpg
Friday, June 24, 2011
June 22...23....24....
I cannot describe the ride I have been on for the last few days. My well of emotions is over ridden
with love I must say thank you to all those who so generously shared their support and gave to my daughter and myself and my family.... so much to write...so many pictures to upload... but i'll give it a try...
tonight i'll write
tomorrow I'll load...some and i'll try not to be too long with it all...
on the 22nd of June I woke at 430 am...dressed, went to work, did my floor, but was a bit out of tune....as...
It really all started there...on Wednesday at work, my rush
Jimmy G --- came to me,his cell phone in hand.... my husband was on the phone, Dd has to go to the hospital right away, she has merconium in her water....
So I left and went to BW... where all my children were born...so much has changed
In labor now they let you drink and eat if you want,.... not I, I said... robbery...but anyway...this isnt about me, or is it... well of course it is, because my blog is about me...it is my space...enough though...
Arrived at BW and my baby DD was already in the triage where they access the situation,
was it bs, and would she be sent home, or was it really something and she would be kept...
DD was a keeper...
She was moved into a room with a hospital bed with removable parts, so she would be able to deliver in the room, the room also contained two chairs, one sleeper chair, the was not at all comfortable to sit on, and one chair that ended up being my chair that was not too bad for sitting on, but for sleeping on, or napping on it as I did, well ...it could not mold or stretch out so... to say the least... it bit me a few times...but
anyway...DD was doing ok, having contractions, but she had contractions in her back and she was very uncomfortable....
she changed into her old nightgown she brought because she thought she could do that...and she could for a while === until the reality that things don't always turn out the way you think they are going to turn out happened and it did happen...and it happened to her....
The hospital staff was sloooowwww in starting her on pit...which is what they give to try to kick up labor..but of course...it was 3 pm by this time....and Dj, her mate was late, and her friend, Kitty, i'll call her was taking the bus in from NYC... it was going to be a fun time...
DD would get to labor easily, take showers, and drink juice, and sit on a labor ball... but the reality was
After almost two days of laboring, Dd had two internal monitors, a catheter, oxygen mask, an epidural attachment, 4 different fluids in her IV, saline, antibiotics,2 types---- just in case because they thought she had an infection, and pit, she was as I say wired up ...and she needed to stay in bed..plus she could not move from her right side or the baby would go into stress and his heart beat would disappear...
they tried 3 times to have her go into heavy contractions, but it wasn;t happening...
Dr Feinberg came in and strecthed her to see if that would help kick things along and he even said that baby had coned... he was right there...and Dianna was in a lot of pain....so it was decided that a c section would be done...and that was postponed 3 times too because of different reasons... i just highly recommend that if one is having a child that person should skip the midwife clinic and go to a private because At the end of all this I ended up getting pretty upset and my daughter was completly exhauted, both physically and emotionally..and needless to say, so was I.
But the best part is that Alastair was born, healthy even though he did have to spend a few hours in the baby ICU because he was having a little trouble breathing but now he seems ok and even though my daughter has some how become atheiest in her 21 years, I prayed and I do pray because every little bit helps.
with love I must say thank you to all those who so generously shared their support and gave to my daughter and myself and my family.... so much to write...so many pictures to upload... but i'll give it a try...
tonight i'll write
tomorrow I'll load...some and i'll try not to be too long with it all...
on the 22nd of June I woke at 430 am...dressed, went to work, did my floor, but was a bit out of tune....as...
It really all started there...on Wednesday at work, my rush
Jimmy G --- came to me,his cell phone in hand.... my husband was on the phone, Dd has to go to the hospital right away, she has merconium in her water....
So I left and went to BW... where all my children were born...so much has changed
In labor now they let you drink and eat if you want,.... not I, I said... robbery...but anyway...this isnt about me, or is it... well of course it is, because my blog is about me...it is my space...enough though...
Arrived at BW and my baby DD was already in the triage where they access the situation,
was it bs, and would she be sent home, or was it really something and she would be kept...
DD was a keeper...
She was moved into a room with a hospital bed with removable parts, so she would be able to deliver in the room, the room also contained two chairs, one sleeper chair, the was not at all comfortable to sit on, and one chair that ended up being my chair that was not too bad for sitting on, but for sleeping on, or napping on it as I did, well ...it could not mold or stretch out so... to say the least... it bit me a few times...but
anyway...DD was doing ok, having contractions, but she had contractions in her back and she was very uncomfortable....
she changed into her old nightgown she brought because she thought she could do that...and she could for a while === until the reality that things don't always turn out the way you think they are going to turn out happened and it did happen...and it happened to her....
The hospital staff was sloooowwww in starting her on pit...which is what they give to try to kick up labor..but of course...it was 3 pm by this time....and Dj, her mate was late, and her friend, Kitty, i'll call her was taking the bus in from NYC... it was going to be a fun time...
DD would get to labor easily, take showers, and drink juice, and sit on a labor ball... but the reality was
After almost two days of laboring, Dd had two internal monitors, a catheter, oxygen mask, an epidural attachment, 4 different fluids in her IV, saline, antibiotics,2 types---- just in case because they thought she had an infection, and pit, she was as I say wired up ...and she needed to stay in bed..plus she could not move from her right side or the baby would go into stress and his heart beat would disappear...
they tried 3 times to have her go into heavy contractions, but it wasn;t happening...
Dr Feinberg came in and strecthed her to see if that would help kick things along and he even said that baby had coned... he was right there...and Dianna was in a lot of pain....so it was decided that a c section would be done...and that was postponed 3 times too because of different reasons... i just highly recommend that if one is having a child that person should skip the midwife clinic and go to a private because At the end of all this I ended up getting pretty upset and my daughter was completly exhauted, both physically and emotionally..and needless to say, so was I.
But the best part is that Alastair was born, healthy even though he did have to spend a few hours in the baby ICU because he was having a little trouble breathing but now he seems ok and even though my daughter has some how become atheiest in her 21 years, I prayed and I do pray because every little bit helps.
For my dear Daughter, my baby
Labor
for dd's labor and delivery
and the birth of Alastair Anthony
Bells bells all I hear are bells
bells the bleep beep mAchine
wired-- you're the keep.
Bells bong as big ben is broken
night into dawn --- bells
bells bing bong ping
pong from here to chair
to bed then ears and snared.
Bells bells not from the Dell
chime away calling
the nurses come -- nurses stay
bells bells bells
pressure low not pressed tight,
Pressure go from day through night
low
low cuff no help,
higher with the doctors help.
Quiet bells, quiet site, drapery hanging
in the light, quiet want, quiet eyes,
tears drip silent
want delight
clips do not clatter, knife does not scrap
beep beep beep beep
soothing steady beep beep
ears perched, sweet call waiting to hear a
cry, beep beep beep beep,
not a peep, but then
in the quiet, a small wah and then another
Doctors ooooo oooooing, nurses awwww awing,
mother soooo waiting, wanting
Hand held tight, then tighter still
Words not soothing,
eyes not seeing, trying to peek beyond,
Listening waiting, mother anxious,
she seeks him, then sees him,
her eyes employ
he is
Alastair, her child, her newborn boy.
_jw 6.11
for dd's labor and delivery
and the birth of Alastair Anthony
Bells bells all I hear are bells
bells the bleep beep mAchine
wired-- you're the keep.
Bells bong as big ben is broken
night into dawn --- bells
bells bing bong ping
pong from here to chair
to bed then ears and snared.
Bells bells not from the Dell
chime away calling
the nurses come -- nurses stay
bells bells bells
pressure low not pressed tight,
Pressure go from day through night
low
low cuff no help,
higher with the doctors help.
Quiet bells, quiet site, drapery hanging
in the light, quiet want, quiet eyes,
tears drip silent
want delight
clips do not clatter, knife does not scrap
beep beep beep beep
soothing steady beep beep
ears perched, sweet call waiting to hear a
cry, beep beep beep beep,
not a peep, but then
in the quiet, a small wah and then another
Doctors ooooo oooooing, nurses awwww awing,
mother soooo waiting, wanting
Hand held tight, then tighter still
Words not soothing,
eyes not seeing, trying to peek beyond,
Listening waiting, mother anxious,
she seeks him, then sees him,
her eyes employ
he is
Alastair, her child, her newborn boy.
_jw 6.11
New baby
Alastair is here. DD suffering a little bit. Emergency csection. I am so tired. So emotional. Will write lots later
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Still at the hospital
A little freaked out. A lot over tired. I pray for my daughter and her child. God give them strength and keep them healthy. It is scary going through this. Just friggen scary
Still at hospital
Long day for my dear Dd. Long labor unlike mine. Have to bite my tongue a lot. Oh well
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
June 22...
How did this happen, nearly a month has gone by...finally off antibiotics and still a small lump in my elbow... arghhh...next week to the drs and then we shall go from there... a bit depressed about it. my leg is doing ok, i just get tired and my back is sore... being off the humira i think is good for me, ive actually lost 5 lbs... so it was probably that drug that was putting weight on me...back to work and just continuing on ..what more can i do...waiting for the baby to decide to come... soon i hope.
used to have a video link now missing must do more research cant believe how little time i have boo hoo
used to have a video link now missing must do more research cant believe how little time i have boo hoo
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Mom's Day
The weekend was like a day -- was one of sunshine from beginning to end... It began with the Bruins winning the cup and Mom's beautiful birthday bash. Who could ask for more?
June 20th
still waiting for Remy... when will he decide to come... soon i hope... Took pics that I have to post... unfortunately no time to do so...day off..swimming ...rug cleaning.and keeping the burning foot happy..whoya...
loving life
loving life
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