Memorial day weekend

I have 3 days off. Whoopee. It has been forever. I miss my son. And well. That's how it is

Life is good but I still have wishes and dreams

More pics

Moving my. Office

Nothing like moving my office

Can't sleep

Woke at 3:30 again. Too much stuff
Maybe it is the rain I hear crackling tapping or the wind I hear billowing blowing. Maybe it isn't heart yearning to make love perfect with all it's imperfections. Maybe it is me. Maybe it is you. Maybe

What maybe will be maybe. I can't change a thing. It doesn't matter how unhappy you are or I am or the family. It is all in his court and he uses every excuse do. Let go let God I say to you. You have those two little loves. Their lives so precious. I wish I could change things but I can't. For you for him. It just sucks for us too

May20th

11 dAYS left to May... Dianna is upset and I feel bad for her, her boss is being unfair and saying mean things to her.  That is bs.  I could get a live in maid, then why doesnt she.  I don't know anyone who would work for that amount of money....really she would have to pay alot more.

On the other spectrum I don't know, just crazy and worried and need to get out and relax.  Starting to empty my office..wow  this is going to be difficult.  here I go

concerned... emailed a fwd and it showed up...very odd.
having a difficult morning, do not know where to go with this..infiltrated liver...geesh, cyst on my kidney, gall stones..stuff i dont even want to know about ouch... not a good prospect for the future. but oh well
here i go

Lynk and lil Ricky

J

J

Mother's Day

Everyone says, Happy Mother's Day, and I do mean it to all...yet I am so very unhappy...unhappy there is no milk for my coffee...it just pisses me off, unhappy that my son is back in a program and trying to find himself yet again after a horrid 3 weeks of wondering what the fuck he was doing...it is just brutal...he was mean and just non relenting to everyone, and then he had something going somewhere else and who does he think he is creating children and just not being there for them.  I am just sooo angry. He keeps digging a deeper hole for himself, will it never end?

Johnny Ricky and kids. Leaves

Charlestown. Bunker Hill

Yes this was a beautiful day

Little Daffy Duck going to be a test specimen. Boo hoo

Link and Ricky and Heather

Can't sleep

Woke at 3:30 again. Too much stuff
Maybe it is the rain I hear crackling tapping or the wind I hear billowing blowing. Maybe it isn't heart yearning to make love perfect with all it's imperfections. Maybe it is me. Maybe it is you. Maybe

What maybe will be maybe. I can't change a thing. It doesn't matter how unhappy you are or I am or the family. It is all in his court and he uses every excuse do. Let go let God I say to you. You have those two little loves. Their lives so precious. I wish I could change things but I can't. For you for him. It just sucks for us too

Sad still

I can't take it when things are crazy. I can't stand people who let other people down. Selfish. God help me

No sense

Nonsense looking for something that will never be there

No sense

Nonsense looking for something that will never be there

Sad today

Realize how short life is. Yet again
My mom is the matriarch of the family. Her older sister is alive but not there mentally. So many gone since my Dad. Change is certain but there is nothing like knowing you are getting older too
No energy. Waiting for some sun

Nerves

I have a bad case of nerves today. Hopefully 7 days will go by fast.

waiting to hear is extremely taxing on the brain, you try not to think about it but it is there... i am dont with this crap i say to myself, yet i find myself wandering back there, into my medical record online,  looking to see if the results came in...i know i am ok but geesh it would be reassuring for the drs office to tell me...i have to wait they said 7 days.
thurs
fri
sat
sun
mon
tues
wed
thurs  this is the day... i call

it does not reassure me either that i log into here and see that i have a new set up boo hoo
i much figure it all out but no time today....
it is raining and my left ear is deaf  very bad oh well
time to get up and go
boo hoo...stopping the celebrex has enabled me to lose a few pounds thank God